Last night I channeled my inner Britney, minus the umbrella. Pop culture reference for you youngins- google it. In other words, I shaved my head.
I have control issues. It’s pretty well known. But I’ll be damned if I am going to let this situation take all of my control away. We picked a day and we did it. On my terms. John and Little Harlon joined in the fun too. Of course John looks handsome and Harlon was such a trooper. He sat still the whole time and looks just as adorable as his daddy.
I can’t say that I wasn’t nervous. Or that it doesn’t make me sad. After all, I am only human. I’ve had my hair for 32 years. Yes, it has been very unattractively short at times 😕 but it’s never been gone. I am sure I’ll feel the same when I have my mastectomy. Missing a little of myself. But at the same time I know that hair and/or breasts don’t make the person. My attitude is what makes me and I am the only one in control of that.
I imagined I’d feel free and lighter. Instead, I feel like I have a super tight bun in my non existent hair. I do feel taller though. Weird. Showering was trip. I used way too much shampoo. I even used conditioner- habit.
I’ll be donating my hair again to Pantene Beautiful Lengths- a program that gives FREE real hair wigs to women fighting the big C. As of right now, I don’t plan on getting a wig myself. But who knows, that could change and I am ok with that.
A quick follow up to my first day of chemo. The nurse said Saturday’s would most likely be my day. Right now I am feeling ok. A little headache but otherwise fine. I’ll be taking it easy today and resting up for our big pumpkin patch outing tomorrow. 🎃 I mean, it is October already!